Entries tagged with gestwicki

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SO.

I just found out that I'm moving to San Francisco!

I'M MOVING TO SAN FRANCISCO.

Whaaat? *flail* My boss took a job at UCSF and the lab is moving there. I am definitely going to go, and probably most of the lab is too. He just dropped the bomb on us out of the blue today, then took us all out for lunch (and beer) as a sort of - apology? Heh. Some people are taking it much worse than others. I personally am getting to a quite okay place with it, mostly because I'm already far along in my PhD and will only be in SF for 1.5 years, and I was planning on making a big move from Ann Arbor after grad school anyway, so this just accelerates the timeline.

Still, it's a pretty big shock. The worst part is that I'll be moving away from my dad, and it's been so wonderful being in the same city with him again. I never got a chance to tell him today and I'm kind of dreading it. But I think he'll be excited for me too, because it really is a special opportunity.

SO. FLIST. Whoever is still out there. Who knows anything about San Francisco or California? General advice on moving out there? Thoughts, warnings, anything? I know I haven't been around at all but I still consider you a great source of advice and comfort.

I'M MOVING TO SAN FRANCISCO HOLY SHIT!

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Firstly, thank you everso to the lovely

xsnarkasaurus for the adorable dragon on my profile! ♥

I had a most wunderbar weekend on a ski trip with my friends! It was preceded by a nutso week. I shall talk about them! (With a couple visual aids!)

( My nutso and (sometimes) wunderbar life. )

This weekend was ALSO a fantastic weekend for my beloved football teams. Sadly I wasn't able to watch it live, but since I was off having so much fun that's okay. :) I got back from snowshoeing Saturday to find that Mainz had won 4-0!!! The noise I made when I saw that would have terrified dogs, haha. My beautiful Ádám scored for the first time since coming back from injury, AND it was against the same team he tore his ACL against more than a year ago! I'm so happy for him. Zidan scored his fourth goal in four games for us, bless his heart. My favorite teeny one, Nicolai, also nicked a goal, and EMCM finished poor Kaiserslautern off. It was our big derby too! Beyond pleased to see all my boys so happy. ♥♥

Also happy were my other boys in red and white, who won THEIR derby 5-2! That's right, Arsenal TROUNCED Sp*rs, and it was glorious. They went down 2-0, then came back to score 5 unanswered goals, including a truly glorious Robin van Perfect strike and FINALLY a Rosicky goal after which he looked so happy I got all teary. AND a Sagna header! AND a Walcott brace! Ahhhh! Take THAT, Gareth fucking Bale, with your stupid face and your stupid dives. The relief of the Arsenal boys was palpable, and the Emirates was just hopping (I managed to catch part of the second half on a skippy stream at the lodge). YAY!

Ádám and Mo are my darling derbysieger! <333

Lalala that's it for tonight!

Current Mood: melancholy

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Birds fly over the rainbow, why then oh why can't I?

Time for a melancholy late night post.

This week has absolutely vanished. What am I doing with my time? I don't know. I've been fighting tooth and nail with this publication I'm trying to write for weeks (well, months) now. I had a period in January where I was super productive, then I skidded to a halt for various reasons and had a hard time getting over the activation barrier. I think I finally did it today though, just in time for my boss's return tomorrow. Phew.

Science is frustrating the shit out of me. Most days I hate it.

I got an email from my undergrad chemistry department's secretary. She wants a current photo of me to post on a bulletin board next to an essay I wrote for the department when I was a senior in college. The essay is titled "A Mile in Shoes that Don't Fit" and it's about how by doing research I realized that I... didn't want to do research.

A couple months later, I let other people change my mind. Now I'm at grad school.

So she wants my photo to put up my essay which might as well be titled "Anne is a Hypocrite." Excellent.

I wish I had listened to my instincts.

Tonight was a Very Bad No Good night. First I learned that Ryan J is leaving Empires. What the fuck. That means I likely saw his last show with them a couple weeks ago. I mean, I'm grateful to have had that, but RYAN!! :'((( I love Ryan so very much and the band won't be the same without him. I still remember my first Empires show in Baltimore, ages upon ages ago, when he cut his finger and showed us the blood, and shot nerf darts at Sean, and happily signed the print of Howl's cover that I had printed. He's such a joy to be around, always smiling, always kind and warm. And oh how he wails on those drums. I will miss him so very, very much. Bye Ryan J. :(

Then I learned of the very tragic suicide of a young man, a fellow football fan, whom I did not know but who was friends with friends of mine. I read his Twitter and his thoughtful, aching Tumblr posts. I couldn't help but notice how often the word death came up in the last couple weeks. I didn't know him but I saw a lovely, kind soul, a soul in so much pain, and I am inexpressibly sad that he could not find help. He was clearly loved and he will be missed. I am sorry that I never knew him. RIP James.

I rounded off this spectacular evening by watching the film Third Star, which stars Benedict Cumberbatch. He plays a young man dying of cancer who goes on one last trip with his friends. It is a lovely, tragic film, aching and fragmented and messy and it's about how sometimes you just don't have time to have a neat ending. So of course I ended that sobbing my eyeballs out.

Yeah. It's been a night. Off to bed with me.

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This is the bromance that has to end ;__;

Just for the record, this is what has stolen me away for the past month:

Those are my beautiful Mainz boys, Lewis and André, who are talented and tiny and perfect and the hugest BFFs. *sighs and chinhands* (Lewis is the one that's allergic to clothes <333) Sadly they're BOTH leaving my team next year, and they're not even going to the same place, so that's a little bit heartbreaking. But I love them, and I love them for bringing such a perfect year to my team, and I will continue to love them wherever their paths may take them.

I just wanted to share their cute little bromance with you. You're welcome. :D

Life is mildly crazy right now. I went from being only in charge of my own self to being responsible for training two new students in the lab! *flails hands* The high schooler is doing great - I've had her a couple weeks and she's really caught on fast, she's a sharp cookie. She also just graduated so technically not a high schooler, but still never worked in a lab! I'm very impressed. The other one is weirdly more tough; even though he's an MD-PhD student who knows his shit, I'm teaching him something he's never done and I've only done two YEARS ago, so we're kind of the blind leading the blind, oops. Also my boss isn't around right now and it's tough to figure out exactly what he wants when he's not, you know, here. So that's an adventure. Luckily he's a good humored dude with a sharp tongue and we spend half our time cracking up, so I think we'll at least have fun while we're mucking about.

Josh came over last night (Sunday) even though he had had a long tiring weekend with his family - I told him he didn't have to and he told me not to be silly. :3 We just cuddled and watched Serenity (his first time!!!) and it was amazing. \o/ That movie still makes me gasp and cry, it is my favorite in the whole wide 'verse. He really enjoyed it too, I am happy to report. :D Even though I sent him home at a reasonable hour I didn't get much sleep and was basically a zombie today, oops, and since he's a princess who needs 8 hours of beauty sleep he probably was worse off. But you know what? 100% worth it. And I may or may not be seeing him again tomorrow. (Can't stay away, omg.)

As for the OTHER man in my life - my daddy, hee - we just made plans to go out for a daddy-daughter dinner on Thursday! \o/ I'm treating him for Father's Day of course, and since it's Restaurant Week I get to REALLY treat him, yay. I don't know if I ever mentioned it here but my dad moved here last fall to live with his brother (lost job, lost house... yet he's happier than he's been in a long time) and it's amazing to have him around all the time. I love my daddy ever so!

Err that's it! Just trying to get back into this regular posting nonsense. And also trying to get back into the rhythm of flist reading! It feels really good to dip my toes back into your lives again! I'm really looking forward to rejoining this community, as much as I can. ♥

Current Mood: pleased
Current Music: Remy Zero - Perfect Memory (I'll Remember You) | Powered by Last.fm

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So! Hello!

HELLO LIVEJOURNAL. It has been a while, hasn't it? I'm awfully sorry... again. My life might become more conducive to updating in the near future (more on that in a moment) so I'm going to TRY. Once again. I cannot promise anything. But here, at least, is a snapshot!

In the past week my life has changed at rather lightning pace, so there's a lot of current things to talk about. But first, a rundown of the last... oh dear, six months!

Last I left you, I had given my second year seminar. I then went to a conference in Chicago and presented a poster, which went really well! For the next four months, I worked my ass off on my preliminary exam. That consists of writing a thesis research proposal in grant format, then orally defending it to my thesis committee. I basically made myself sick with stress, and in the event the exam was chill and smooth and my professors basically didn't push anything too hard. So that was a huge relief! And as a result, I am officially a PhD candidate (as opposed to a pre-candidate) \o/!

So fast forward to May and June, when I've been much more of a person! I finally got to go back to Chicago to see

rhombal and

musictoyourlips! :D And

contrariangie was visiting too! We went to see Empires (BEST <333 they're so amazing to see IN Chicago) with Jon Walker opening, lolol. He's kind of terrible, but very earnest. We went to the Globe Pub to watch the last day of the Premier League, I saw a Robin van Perfect goal and ate Roxanne's Arsenal cupcakes, had a lovely chat with a lovely Scottish man and met an Irish boy, and got introduced to an amazing German black lager (!) called Köstritzer (yummm) by a Manchester United fan (booo). We mainlined the entirety of Downton Abbey and HOMG IT IS AMAZING AND CUTE IRISH CHAUFFEUR AND SEXY EARLY FEMINIST COME TO MEEEE. Also Dan Stevens. :D Then I had to leave :((( And I miss their faces :((((((

OH AND I WENT TO SEE MY CHEMICAL ROMANTICS AND THEY WERE AMAZING AND PLAYED VAMPIRES AND VAMPIRE MONEY AND LOTS OF OTHER THINGS AND I LOVE THEM TO TINY BITS AND PIECES. Ahem.

In OTHER news, soccer/football is still my life, it is ridic. Mainz were badasses at the end and QUALIFIED FOR EUROPA YAY. Lewis Holtby remains my future husband. Germany are a bit "what is this fuckery?" sometimes but I still love all their faces. And I got to see both the US women's AND men's national teams live recently! The women beat Japan in a friendly, and the men beat Canada in the Gold Cup group stage (last night!). That was so much fun. The crowds here leave much to be desired, but both games were reasonably high-action and oh man, seeing Abby Wambach and Clint Dempsey score in person was something else.

Just this week, I found out that I'm doing an internship at a local biotechnology company for the next three months! :O I start on June 20th and I will actually have a normal human schedule (i.e. 9 to 5) and no weekends and I'm sort of embarrassingly excited about that. My boss is a bit annoyed that I have to leave (this is a requirement for my funding) but he's trying to make the best of it, and I'm selfishly relieved. Oops. But it should be a good experience in a lot of ways and I am definitely looking forward to it.

In much more exciting recent news, I have finally met a boy! :3 Usually I'll babble about some crush on here and it never comes to anything, but no really, I MET a BOY. His name is Josh! We met on OK Cupid, had our first date last Monday, and we have already had three more dates and he's spent the night in my bed. And I do mean spent the night, ahem. It's faster than I'm used to, but I'm completely comfortable and happy and relaxed which is a very very good thing, and a bit surprising. He's sexy (oh so sexy) AND nerdy - I didn't know that existed in real life! He goes to the gym a loooot so his biceps and everything else are TO DIE FOR, but he's also getting his PhD in nuclear engineering and is frighteningly intelligent. In a very good way. For some reason he appears to be very attracted to me, so basically this week has been a giddy delight. He's sweet but sarcastic, kind, naughty, brilliant, impulsive -all of these great qualities all swirled together. I've never met anyone like him, really, and right now I am just along for the ride and having a blast. Basically I am hoping for a super fun summer with him and not really thinking about beyond that. We are going to see Thor tomorrow night! :D

So that's about it! Candidacy, Chicago, internship, BOY. I hope that with 1) a 9 to 5 job and 2) no regular football, I will have more time to post, but I cannot promise anything. Tell me what is most important in your lives, please! There is a LOT of LJ to catch up on, and I basically have no hope of doing so. As always, you can find me on twitter with this name too!

♥

Current Mood: cold
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Pretending to be a grownup

So one of my New Year's resolutions is to try to reconnect with LJ. I'll probably fail miserably, but I genuinely miss both the community and the amazing record of my life LJ was for such a long time, so I'd really like to get back into the swing of it. Twitter is a serious hindrance, and I have a whole other social life there, but I'm going to try my hardest. If you DO have Twitter though, please do follow me - I'm exsequar there too and always reachable. :) It's not at all about soccer/football anymore, I made a separate account, so if you're worried about that, please don't be! I'd love to talk to you. ♥

Starting small, I'm just going to make a Life post about my week and stuff! So on Tuesday I completed a reasonably large hurdle of my PhD program - the second year seminar. It's kind of a warm up for our candidacy exams but felt pretty huge on its own. Basically I had to make a 20 minute presentation on my research, presenting to people outside of my lab for the first time. This meant that I had to very clearly introduce the material for people unfamiliar with my field, present and justify my hypothesis, and present what data I have that supports that hypothesis before, as well as providing a coherent plan for my research moving forwards. I also felt I had to be very very comfortable with the literature because I could get ANY questions afterward. What this basically meant was that I spent 4 days with my family for Christmas, then immediately began spending 10-12 hours in lab every day, reading papers and putting together my presentation, as well as getting that last crucial piece of data. I bought a lot of frozen food and essentially lived in my lab. But it paid off, because my presentation went great! My actual slides ended up really pretty - including a model I built from scratch using Adobe Illustrator because all the old ones my lab uses are so ugly - and my labmates and boss helped me construct a clear, coherent narrative so it felt fluent and comfortable. Then I got a really great set of questions and was able to easily answer them all, with bonus references to the literature because I had spent all that time reading! I got lots of positive feedback afterward, and my dad even got to see it and was very proud. I'm so relieved to have it done, but I'm also really proud of how well it went. It was the first time I felt maybe I could really do this thing - that is, be a grownup. Not necessarily a scientist, but a grownup. It's a step in the right direction. ;)

I then spent the rest of this week turning that presentation into a poster to give at a conference this weekend in Chicago! It's a very busy week, yes it is. It's the same conference that I went to last year and I really enjoyed it then, so I'm happy to be going again, I look forward to it. I also get to meet up with some darling fangirls tomorrow night so I'm excited. :D After all of this whirlwind, then it's just back to the normal grindstone of lab research. Doing all of this work on making my project clear to others has made it clearer to ME too though, so I hope that I'll feel a bit more confident in my research as I move forwards.

Also super exciting is THE BUNDESLIGA STARTS BACK UP TOMORROW!!!!! *giddy wriggling* That's the German football league for the majority of you out there who are totally lost. :P It's been on hiatus since before Christmas and I have been DYING of boredom. I mean, it was good timing because I wouldn't have been half as focused on my work if it hadn't been on break, but now it's coming BACK and I couldn't be more excited. :DDD I get my beautiful baby Lewis and my badass Basti and hopefully both Mainz and Bayern kicking ass and taking names. I can't help it, I love Mainz, sorry to my Bayern girls out there. At this point I just want both of them to do really well. It's kind of inevitable that Bayern will end up in at least second, so I don't feel bad for rooting for Mainz to do the best they very can. At this point I would like to register a prediction for the end of the season, and we'll see how far off I am: Borussia Dortmund, Bayern Munich, Bayer Leverkusen, Schalke 05, Mainz. That would put Mainz in the Europa League next year, which would be a fantastic achievement for my little baby club. ♥ (And little Lewis has been hinting that he'd like to stay in Mainz for another year... oh please please pleeeease let it happen, football gods!)

In hilarious fandom-sports related news (yes that was a totally valid segue), Johnny Weir is coming to my Borders for a book signing. Lol. Lololol. I'm tempted to go just for the lolz but I should really be at work at that time, so I probably won't. Oh Johnny. Maybe I'll feel the force of his sparkling from my lab.

Speaking of sparkling, OMG THIS T-SHIRT. Dear My Chemical Cupcakes, ILU. (Danger Days is still, like, the best album ever. Well, after Three Cheers. But OMG SO GOOD.)

Last night I saw I Love You Phillip Morris!! I've been wanting to see this ever since I heard it was being made like three years ago. EWAN MCGREGOR!!!!! Ugh, he was so precious and wonderful, all blonde and earnest and Texan and sweet and I WANTED TO PUT HIM IN MY POCKET. I mean, Jim Carrey was great too, and it was a really good film, funny and weird and poignant and tragic. I enjoyed it a whole lot. But mostly EWAN!!! I now want to watch every single film he's done again. Yes even The Pillow Book. Ewannnnnnn. I miss him. *draws pink sparkly hearts*

I should probably pack for Chicago.... so I'll leave you with that. It felt really good to write an LJ post again, I'm not gonna lie, so hopefully I'll start being able to keep it up. Tell me what's up with you, darlings!

Current Mood: relieved

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There's nothing you can say to make them go away

This is my 2,501st post! Yay! *throws confetti* My my, I've certainly had a lot to say, haven't I? Not recently as much, sadly, but LJ has been such a hugely important part of my life for the last 6 years or so. I'm so glad I found it and all of you. ♥

Life things! My daddy has now moved to Ann Arbor and it's so wonderful to have him around. He's moved into his brother's house because he couldn't afford to keep his house in Connecticut anymore. It's unfortunate, and he's sad he had to leave my sister (who's in high school and living with my mom), but he's always loved Ann Arbor and so much more of his family (his two siblings, his nieces and nephews, me!) are here and I think it's going to ultimately make him happier. He already got a good offer on his house back in CT and the inspection process is underway, so fingers crossed that that all goes smoothly! An offer this soon was definitely not expected in this economy, so I hope so much it works out. I recruited some friends to help him move furniture in and stuff, so that was fun, and since then we've just been hanging out now and then, and it's really, really nice. My daddy is my favorite person in the whole world, so having him around is like having a best friend nearby again (something I've felt sorely lacking ever since Francisco moved away). Yesterday we went for a wonderful walk/hike through the UMich arboretum - it was the most perfect fall day, 60s and sunny, and we had a lovely time. Then he made his delicious stew for dinner and ohhh I have missed my daddy's home cooking! It was a really great day.

Another great thing about yesterday is I finally got my bike!! My dad brought my old high school bike out with him and so now I finally have it, so I bought a helmet and a lock and lights and I am all ready to go! I hopped on it for a quick spin yesterday and it felt so right - I didn't realize how much I had missed it! Biking is so much more fun than running to me - I love speed! I'm going to be biking to and from work from now on (almost 1 mile each way) and tonight I took it out for a little while. I came back sweaty and noodle legged but it was so great, I really loved it. Hopefully I can make that a regular part of my life. :D

( Moar life thoughts and such. )

So that's my life right now! I figured it was time for an update of some sort.

How are you? ♥

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Today I spent a lovely Sunday afternoon at the outlets with my roomies! I didn't plan on buying much (lol) but came away with this ridiculous haul:

Shirt from Banana Republic ($11)
Henley from Old Navy ($12)
Deep purple peacoat from Anne Klein ($99 down from $280, oh my god)
Two pairs of jeans from Aeropostale that actually FIT ($42 on a buy-one-get-one-free deal)
Three bras from Bali ($45)
Five bags of cookies from Pepperidge Farms ($10)

SO BASICALLY I WOULD CALL THAT A WIN. The purple peacoat in particular I am soooooo excited about - it's mid thigh length, with this beautiful tiered collar and a belt and UGH I LOVE IT. :') I was sort of idly wanting a new peacoat because mine is all tattered, but when I put this one on I just fell in love. And how can you argue with that price?

Besides being an entirely successful shopping spree, it was just a lovely day with my girls! The weather was SO BEYOND PERFECT, mid 60s with cotton ball clouds and sunshine, and I loved it to pieces. My roomies were chilly but it was just ideal for me. :) And speaking of roomies, I have two new ones! Our two public health roomies moved out, leaving me, Emily and Nichole, so we chose new roomies over the summer and I must say that once again we hit the jackpot. Alex is starting law school with the intent of working in international conflict resolution. She just finished a masters program in BRUSSELS and once spent a semester in Ireland, omg! AND SHE LOVES ALL THINGS JOSS WHEDON, I MEAN WHAT, HOW IS SHE SO PERFECT. HER FAVORITE CHARACTER IS FAITH!!!! She's beautiful and funny and smart and giggly and assertive and I might have a little girlcrush, LOL. But I really love hanging out with her. And Kortni just graduated from UM and is now working in the UM hospital as a research assistant for a neuropsych prof. She's tall and funny and a little absurdist sometimes - she spent our walk home from drinks tonight PRETENDING TO BE A PTERODACTYL, ahahahaha, Emily and I almost broke something laughing. So obviously she's super fun to have around. :D Basically it's an awesome mix of personalities again and I'm so happy! I love having a fun house of roommates, but also my own awesome room so I can retreat whenever I need to.

Hey, look at me, doing a daily update! I'm going to try to get back into the swing of this because it was SO nice to have LJ comments in my inbox again. I promise it won't be all fussball all the time. *g*

In work related news, I have been.... really stressed out and in a bad place recently. Nothing seems to work at all anymore, and I have a research plan to write from my boss and I'm having a hard time with it, and I read some things in the literature that make me seriously doubt my hypothesis, and I've been seriously doubting whether I even want to be a scientist, and etc etc etc. I honestly think that coming for my PhD was kind of the easy way out of an otherwise grueling job search, but I've never been able to envision myself as a bench scientist or a professor in the long term. I'm not sure what I DO see myself as though, is the problem. I've been looking at all kinds of alternative types of employment, but in the meantime, I've still got 4 years of research to do. I really hope I can find the heart to see me through it. I'm sure I'll feel a bit better once SOME experiments start going well again.

...that's it! I should probably go to sleep!

Current Mood: relaxed

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With my eyes wide open

A brief update because I feel like I neglect my LJ far too much these days!

Basically to sum up, everything from my last post is still pretty awesome. Indoor soccer was great again, except for how I managed to INJURE myself, god-fucking-dammit. I pulled my quad in high school and I managed to aggravate that old injury pretty badly tonight. :( I really hope the pain will pass quickly, because I don't want to be hampered for next week. I guess this is what I get for not treating my body right for several years. Oops! But the game was much more even this time, we won 2-0, and the guys and gals on my team continue to be really lovely. Iker!goalie is still super hot and super competent, so that is definitely not a bad thing. :D

Science is awesome with a side of terrifying - so many new things to do! Will I be up to it?! Eep. But it's exciting too. :)

And Matt is... Matt is kinda super awesome. I'm really enjoying this thing we've got going so far. Sunday, we went to see Inception (!!!!!!!!! TOM HARDY, PLZ DO ME. OR DO J GORDON-LEVITT. He was JANOVEC in BoB, you guys! <33333) and then back to his place where we just hung out, listened to The Postal Service on vinyl, and exchanged backrubs. I'm super comfortable with him - everything is at this really lovely place of affectionate physical intimacy that's really just cuddly and sweet, so I don't feel pressured or scared like I did with Dave. Basically the speed is lovely and I'm really enjoying it. Today, I went to visit him at the cafe after I left lab, which basically meant hanging out with my laptop, getting a free mug of AMAZING HOLY CRAP coffee (Intelligentsia's Summer Solstice - UNF. I didn't need sugar OR cream!), chatting with the German owner of the coffee shop, and meeting several of Matt's friends. Oh and flirting with Matt outrageously of course. :) It just felt like such a lovely, comfortable, domestic scene and I enjoyed it tremendously.

Fun story - a couple of Matt's friends had just walked in, and Matt called across the room to ask me what kind of coffee I wanted. I flirtatiously said "Why don't YOU decide for me?" A few minutes later, Matt introduced me to his friends, and the girl said "Ohhhhhh! I WONDERED why you were being so flirtatious! That makes more sense now!" And I just laughed and laughed, but I was also delighted because the fact that she recognized my name meant that he's been talking about me, which is rather :DDDDD. Hee!

Also, the other day he described himself as a "radical feminist", which is A++++++ in my book. It's hard enough to find a guy who will understand feminism, let alone one who IS a feminist. And he's not a poser - he's studied this shit and he really believes it. I said something like "I'm sorry I need to shave!" and he just shrugged and said "Why? I don't care. That's your choice." And I was like sdlkfjlskdf awww! I got big hearts in my eyes! ♥

My #ger girls on Twitter continue to brighten my life, as does Die Mannschaft itself. Today a video came to light which was a MONTAGE OF GERMAN FOOTBALLERS HUGGING that had AIRED ON GERMAN TELEVISION. Ahhhh I love Europe. ♥ Oh and I caved and ordered Die Spieler! COME TO ME, 200 GLOSSY PAGES OF MY BOOOYS.

I also spent this Saturday with my cousins and my sister at a Renaissance Faire! Always an amazing time. We saw REAL JOUSTING, as in, huge ass horses and genuine lances. It was a father against son joust, and the son (19 years old and adorable) got brutally unhorsed. Took quite the fall in 150 lbs of armor! He got back on the horse though, which was very impressive. That was a fantastic sight! And my favorite Ren Faire act, the Rogue Blades, was there, YAY! I've seen them probably 6 or 7 times now. :D They're a comedy-sword fighting troupe, and they've had the same skit for years upon years, but I always always love them. This year, they spontaneously added a fun twist where it became a Star Wars adlib on top of the usual plot, so they pretended their swords were light sabers, made sound effects, and called the short one Yoda. It was phenomenal. <3333

How are you, darlings? I'm ashamed to say I'm falling more and more chronically behind on my flist. :( I miss you!

Current Mood: happy

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Roll around in the awesomeness!

Yesterday was pretttttty fantastic, and I'm going to tell you why!

I woke up epically, ridiculously sore. Like, difficult to lift myself out of bed sore. That's not the fantastic part! The fantastic part is that I'm sore because of indoor soccer and every time I think of that it makes me smile. :D
SCIENCE!!!!1!!!1!11 Science totally WORKED for me yesterday, and I got this awesome amazing result that will guide my project into truly exciting directions. I am such a nerd but this was SO happy-making. I've been feeling a little blah on the science front lately so this was a highly welcome kick in the pants. It also means I get to start doing new and exciting experiment types, which is great cause I was bored of what I was doing before! YAY SCIENCE! I had a great brainstorming session with Jason (my boss) and we have sooo many ideas. *twirls!*
DIE NATIONALMANNSCHAFT! In the past few days, this amazing book has come to light called Die Spieler which is literally 200 enormous glossy pages of photographs of MY BOYS dressed up as old 40s crime drama film characters. SERIOUSLY. THERE ARE HATS AND SUITS AND OLD MERCEDES AND PIANOS AND CAKES AND PILLOW FIGHTS AND POOLS! STRIPPING IN POOLS! Um. They might have deviated from the crime theme a little bit in favor of NAKED WET FOOTBALLERS, but I am seriously not complaining. Unffffffff. One bit that should be delightful to any girl with a beating heart is the following clip, in which Mario says "Wow wow wowwww!" about Basti and Basti declares that "This is fashion!" Yes in English!

♥♥♥♥
The only thing that sucks is that I WANT THAT BOOK SO BADLY but it is $55 with shipping from Germany. :((( I may cave yet...
Relatedly, all of my girls at loewsmiserables! (The fan community for the German national team.) Even though the World Cup is over, the fandom rages on with so much life and laughter and delight! I have made three posts there with over 100 comments of giddy glee and gifs and awesomeness. I love that place and I love our boys. <3333 It's really cool to feel so involved in a fandom - it's been a while!
Also relatedly, my #Ger girls on Twitter! I posted on Loews asking if people wanted a Twitter support group during the World Cup about 3 weeks ago, and what resulted was this super awesome group of girls with whom I have exchanged literally THOUSANDS of Tweets. It's been a blast. I love you guys. ♥
And the best for last... I went on a date last night! :D

So I already told the story about how a barista at my favorite coffee shop offered me his number but I ended up giving mine his later and blah complicated silliness! Well, we have been on two (~three?) dates since then! :D He (Matt) called me last week and asked if I wanted to go to dinner and a movie, and so we did, and it was quite nice. We saw Winter's Bone, the Sundance festival winner - a very stark and gorgeous film, I highly recommend it. Then we got dinner and drinks and capped off the night with a stroll by the river where we hung out on a bench at 2 AM! It was quite a lovely date, but I must admit that I wasn't feeling a zing - there were a couple things about him that rubbed me the wrong way, so I was having my doubts. But then yesterday he texted me and asked if I wanted to go out for dinner, and of course I wanted to give him a second chance so I said sure, and suggested this noodle bar next to his coffee shop that he loooves but that I hadn't been to yet. So I go to the restaurant and he's not there - turns out he locked his keys in his car, WITH THE CAR RUNNING, and is waiting for AAA. *facepalm* Lolz. He was only a couple blocks away so I walked there, laughed at him, and we hung out on the grass for a while waiting for the AAA dude. It was a beautiful summer evening so I didn't really mind! Then we went to dinner, and then to my house for a bit where I gave him my Empires and Gold Motel CDs because he's totally into little indie bands and I want him to LOOOVE them, and also my Dollhouse DVDs, aaaand everything was lovely! I think we were both a lot more relaxed this time and everything was just sweet and fun and he really makes me laugh a lot. I'm definitely, definitely fond and will be seeing more of him!

Now I can tell you a lot of the reasons he's awesome, since this appears to be continuing. So he's a super experienced barista at my favorite coffee shop, which = free coffee and also he's a coffee nerd, which I find AWESOME. He got his degree in "general studies" at UMich after transferring from a couple places, and that included mostly English but also Womens Studies (!!!!) and a bunch of other random stuff. He's from a tiny town in upstate Michigan. He loves Firefly and Arrested Development and knows way too much about way too many indie bands (though he's not TOO pretentious about it). He's good friends with most of the people in the local music scene. He rooted for Germany in the World Cup (mostly because his boss is German, but still!). He smokes quite a bit of pot but is smart about it, haha. He wants to get his MFA in POETRY. I just. How is he real! I looove that he's a nerd so we speak the same language, but he's a totally different KIND of nerd than I'm used to. It's extremely refreshing to spend time with someone who isn't a scientist!

SOOOOO that's my life right now, in a rather long winded nutshell! Soccer = awesome, science = awesome, fangirls = awesome, German fussballers = awesome, and new boy = awesome.

\o/

Current Mood: pleased

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GIDDY GLEE!

Eeeee! *jumps up and down*

I just got an email telling me I've been awarded the Cellular Biotechnology Training Grant that I applied for a few weeks ago! :DDDDD Yaaaaay! I totally didn't expect this. It's quite competitive, with only a handful of spots for all the grad students here at Michigan, and I got one! It covers full tuition and most of my stipend for at least 2 years and most likely 3.

This is such a huge relief. I feel suddenly like Jason made the right decision when he chose me for his lab, and I'm so glad that I have relieved a big financial burden from his shoulders! It also means that I don't have to write any more grant applications, YAY. \o/ And it's an awesome thing to put on my CV - the money for this comes directly from the NIH, which is obviously quite prestigious.

Oh I am so happy!!! *giddy twirls*

Current Mood: grateful

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Anyone on my flist intrigued by all this Band of Brothers flailing but hasn't gotten around to watching it yet? Borders is having a 50% off sale on the DVD set! :DD Use this link to get a promo code. Valid TODAY ONLY at the website, so hurry! /sales pitch

Seriously, if you've got any inclination at all to see this, DO SO. It's been life changing for me, pretty much literally, but it's also just an exquisite experience of art and humanity. I promise you won't regret it. :)

♥

On an entirely different note, I just got a super sweet compliment. My post-doc just told me that she thinks I have "good hands", and that it's something she noticed while I was rotating here! I was slightly boggled, because honestly I think I have rather clumsy hands sometimes! As a scientist, having "good hands" is invaluable - it determines whether your experiments even work, many times, and ultimately whether the results are reliable and useful for publications. So as far as compliments go, that's a really really awesome one, and an excellent confidence booster. :D

Current Mood: tired

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Too much too soon, too little and now you're coming unglued

Tumblr is really obnoxiously addicting and I kiiind of wish I hadn't joined? BUT THERE'S SO MUCH PRETTY! I started following too many people though, and people reblog each other a lot so things get redundant, and AHHH TAKING OVER. So not okay. BUT. PRETTY. Also there's a lot of love out there for one Jacob Pitts which makes me everso happy. <3

It's also a really interesting venue in which to stretch my Photoshop muscles - I really, really love working on larger canvases, layering images and colors, so that's a whole lot of fun. I just made something I sort of love a whole lot, so I thought I'd pop over here and share it with Livejournal, my first and TRUE love. ♥

(Click for hi-res)

My first idea was just to layer two of the pretty parachute shots on one another, but then I came across the picture with the flames and went hmmmm... so I threw that on top and LOVED it. So I tweaked and textured and I'm really happy with the outcome. Paratroopers! ♥ Do let me know what you think! :)

Today I have been beyond unspeakably exhausted. It was really unpleasant actually. I barely made it alive through lab meeting. Note to self: GO TO BED instead of fucking around on the internet. This is an ongoing problem and my life would be MUCH BETTER if I actually managed to go to bed at a human hour instead of delaying it all the time. My average bedtime is 2 AM, and I wake up at 7 AM. Not really all that healthy! If you see me on Twitter at a stupid hour, yell at me? :)

Anyway, after lab we went out for drinks at happy hour to celebrate one dude getting a postdoc, one paper getting published, and the arrival of two new members of the lab (including me! :)). I hung around for a while and chatted, but did I mention I was tired? So I bowed out a little early and went to Borders, which was VERY fruitful. I bought Eugene Sledge's widely lauded book, With the Old Breed. From what

newredshoes has said while reading it, I know this book is going to get me right in my heart. I'm both thrilled and a little nervous. (I still haven't watched last night's episode of The Pacific, so please don't spoil me!)

I also bought GUY GAVRIEL KAY'S NEW BOOK!!! :DDDD I've been following his blog a bit during the publishing process and EEE I am so excited. The summary looks intriguing and fascinating, as always. I CAN'T WAIT. I love him sfm. ♥

Current Mood: giddy

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It's really happening! There was an EMAIL!

Hi everyone,

I am very pleased to announce that Anne ------ (Chemical Biology) and Leah ------ (Medicinal Chemistry) will be conducting their PhD thesis work in our laboratory, starting in early May. These additions clearly strengthen and extend our core abilities. Please join me in welcoming them back!

Anne will be working to understand how Hsp70s and J proteins converge on specific substrates to make fate decisions. She will be using proteomic and genetic approaches to understand how this multi-protein complex forms and how it is regulated.

Leah will be finding new ways of targeting Hsp27 to impact neurodegenerative disease. She is interested in using this system as a model for how complex, homo-oligomeric, non-enzymes can be targeted in drug discovery.

Cheers,

Jason

:D ;___♥ :DDDD

PhD thesis work omg omg omg *tries to breeeathe*

Current Mood: impressed
Current Music: Green Day - Last of the American Girls / She's a Rebel (feat. John Gallagher Jr., Gerard Canonico, C

Entry tags:

Your faith walks on broken glass

Firstly: Joe Mazzello and Martin McCann are the CUTEST. Joe posted an adorable photo of him and Martin in makeup, complete with adorable caption. I commented, and Martin replied, essentially confirming that they have the most adorablest bromance ever! See???

(That's the caption for the photo at the top.) HEE I AM SO CHARMED. They are such total sweethearts. I hope Martin gets more lines to say later on!

LET'S TALK ABOUT TELEVISION!

I was pining all day to watch Justified ep 6, and I finally got to! ( Oh the hearts in my eyes! )

And I finally watched The Pacific episode 6. ( How fucked are you now? )

I also watched half of Glee this morning. Very entertaining! Also: JGROFF. ♥

Today was awesome for a few reasons. I had lunch with Leah, the other first year who got into Jason's lab. We rotated together last summer, and she's such a sweetheart. That was nice. Then I had a meeting with JASON, yay! He officially signed my papers! I'm officially in the lab! I AM SO THRILLED, WHEE. We had a conversation (well, mostly he talked) about Science and plans for my THESIS PROJECT and where he sees it going in the near future and it was all very fascinating, but wow I need to get my head back in the game! I felt kind of like an idiot. BUT. He understands that I haven't been thinking about this for months, so. I'm going to take next week off, do a lot of reading, and then start on MAY THIRD! YAY!

However, bad news: he did not accept Francisco. Or anyone else, for that matter. I'm... yeah. We (Francisco and I) talked after my meeting with Jason and it was... awkward, and hard. He still hasn't totally decided he's going to Florida, but it's really not looking good. Ugh. :( Not thinking about it not thinking about it. I need to sit with him and have a beer and just talk, I really do.

In lighter news, TONIGHT I WENT SPEED DATING. Lolz. It was mostly hilarious. We only got to talk to like half of the dudes who were there, which kind of sucked because we got a whole slew of nerdy engineer guys who were mostly okay to talk to, but generally not all that attractive. And afterwards we could see all these hot guys wandering around who we didn't get to meet! Lame. There were a few intriguing dudes in there so I checked several yes boxes. We'll see if anything comes of it! *hands* Me and the roomies and our new friend Anna went out for drinks afterward and generally had an awesome girly evening, so it was a win overall. :) I love my roomies SO MUCH oh my goodness. We got so lucky to find each other. ♥

So this is a really long post, and uh, I'm gonna stop. Nighty night!

Current Mood: excited
Current Music: Green Day - Too Much Too Soon (feat. Theo Stockman, Michael Esper, Mary Faber & Alysha Umphress) | P

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With every breath that I am worth here on earth

So as you may recall, I've had to keep the fact that I've gotten into Jason's lab a secret from the people who it affects, i.e. other people who want to get into his lab. But it's been driving me nuts, having to lie directly to my best friends. So today this happened:

SCENE: Sidewalk, University of Michigan. STEFFEN and ANNE have just left FRANCISCO after lunch.

ANNE: Can I tell you a secret?
STEFFEN: Okay.
ANNE (rushed): I got into Jason's lab.
STEFFEN: I didn't think that was much of a secret!
ANNE: Oh! Why?
STEFFEN: Well, you haven't slit your wrists yet.

Touché, sir. Touché.

We (meaning my whole program - 14 people) had a conversation with our program director yesterday. He's kind of a douche, and we haven't had much contact with him, but he asked us for our feedback on the first year of the program. The issue of how hard it's been to get into labs came up, and we had a pretty good discussion. He highlighted explicitly that we are the first class in this program to run headlong into a fucking recession, and that it's affecting us profoundly, via how its affecting the professors. Everyone's tightening their purse strings, and we're getting a lot of the fallout of that. I personally hadn't drawn that concrete of a connection between the two phenomena, but it was really helpful, I think, because we've been resentful of the older students who are like "Oh everyone always finds somewhere they're happy! Don't worry!" but no, it's a genuine worry this year. Fantastic students are caught in limbo and honestly have no home yet. It's very sad. I am incredibly, INCREDIBLY lucky to have gotten exactly what I wanted. I'm a quite humbled by it, to be honest. Jason had an array of great students to choose from, and he... chose me. I only hope I live up to that huge vote of confidence. (Can I share one amazing statistic? Jason published SEVENTEEN PAPERS during five years of graduate school. SEVENTEEN. Seven in 2002 alone! INCLUDING 4 first author papers! INCLUDING A FIRST AUTHOR NATURE PAPER. How is he real?!???)

Francisco's still up in the air. I'm so sad for him, and sad for me likely losing him. Sigh. :(

More cheerful things! THE AMERICAN IDIOT BROADWAY CAST RECORDING HAS BEEN RELEASED! Yay!!! I just bought it and I'm currently basking in my first full listen-through. It's amaaaazing. *___* I might be a little biased, but my favorite so far is Are We the Waiting - STARK. His voice has this beautiful, subtle rasp to it and unffff. I also really love the Last of the American Girls/She's a Rebel mashup, with the gorgeous cello weaving in and out. Favorite Son is beautiful - it's nice to have a song that I haven't heard before. And Whatshername is exquisite. AW HELL THE WHOLE THING IS AMAZING. I know what I'm listening to for the next month. :DD

valmontheights found a super awesome preview video of the musical, with clips from some of the greatest numbers. UGH IT LOOKS SO AMAZING I WANT TO SEE IT TWENTY ZILLION TIMES. STARK SANDS YER FACE AND YER VOICE OMG. AND YER BICEPS OM NOM. <333

OH AND: A FANGIRL HEARD FROM JON HUERTAS HIMSELF THAT THE GEN KILL BOYS ARE PLANNING A TRIP TO NYC TO SEE STARK IN AMERICAN IDIOT. MY HEART GROWING TEN SIZES, LET ME SHOW YOU IT. :DDDDDDDD

Current Mood: sleepy

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I've been floating on a cloud of YAY I'M IN JASON'S LAB YAY YAY YAY! Unfortunately, my current reality isn't quite that awesome and consists of fucking up experiments and a really really shitty group project that I honestly don't know how well we're going to do on. Ugh. So thank god he said yes or else I would be an utter wreck right now. I'm just clinging to it - I'm IN JASON'S LAB! Officially! He even sent out an email today about new lab photos and I was on the email! :DDDDDD

Today has not been a decent Saturday of any kind. I woke up, ate breakfast, went to lab from 2 to 8 PM, ugh, came home, went to grocery store, and worked on aforementioned group project, in the process stressing myself out so badly that I chewed on my fingernails until they all ache and it actually hurts to type. WONDERFUL. Now it's 1:30 AM and I'm exhausted but trying to get through Doctor Who without falling asleep because OMG IT'S AMAAAZING!!!

Tomorrow should be nice though - brunch in Detroit with one branch of my family, then back to Ann Arbor for dinner with another branch! Good times and good food. :D

Although that means no time to work on STUPID PROJECT ARGH. The only good thing about this project is that the one other person in the group actually doing work is this insanely pretty guy. I mean, he would not be out of place on television for us to swoon over. The other day he came to class having not shaved and he had the most exquisite stubble, like Ron Liv's 5 o'clock shadow, and I was captivated. It was kind of a problem. He also has these super blue eyes with long black lashes and a smile to die for... unf. Unfortunately, he's kind of not really my type at all, being from Connecticut and you can TELL. Like, he should be a lawyer with the way he talks sometimes. Gah, I don't know. He sure is purty to look at. And we commiserate about how awful our group is, so that's fun. :P

Random question: how do we feel about the new Youtube layout? Overall I feel it's quite functional, but why did they get rid of the starred rating system? Also, there's no way to tell how many comments there are on a video. They're strange changes that I don't quite get! Overall it does look more streamlined though.

I've been reading a lot of my old entries about just before Dublin and then during. That encompasses my slide into bandom, which is hilarious to watch - did you know at one point I genuinely, honestly thought Gerard and Brendon were gay? LOL. Oh, naive little self. I also thought Frank was the lead guitarist of MCR, gasp! Sacrilege. And it's weird to read myself squealing about Ryan when I really don't like him anymore. Anyway, the beginning of Dublin stuff is even more interesting, to see how different I was. It's very pronounced, actually. Which I knew, but it's awesome to have LJ as a concrete record of that. I hope I keep my LJ archives for my whole life, it's such a potent piece of personal history.

And I need some advice - does anyone have any ideas on the best way to get from either NYC or Philly to Cleveland without a car? I've checked plane, bus, and train, and everything either has wacky layovers (ATLANTA?!) or detours or just takes bloody forever, and it just seems so STUPID. Fucking American public transportation. Or the lack thereof. So any thoughts as to ways I could work that out so it isn't soul-crushingly horrible?

Finally, in Twitter Continues To Be Awesome, Brian Schechter responded to my Twitter-stalking for once. And I just - ahahaha, what.

Love him! He's such a dork. I totally get why he and the MCR boys got along like gangbusters. ♥

Augh so tired. Happy Easter, to all who celebrate! I hope you have lovely days.

Current Mood: lethargic

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So there's a guy in my PhD program who's a decade older than I am and served in the Navy. He's gruff and funny and really cool. Today I asked him if he and his fellow Navy dudes ever danced and made idiots out of themselves on Youtube, and he said Youtube didn't exist when he was in the service! Shocking. Then I mentioned I'd been watching some Marines be ridiculous and he said "Well it's Marines, there's your problem right there." Then he told me this: "You want to get a Marine mad? Tell him Marine means 'My ass riding in naval equipment.' You wanna get him real pissed off? The alternative definition is 'Muscles are required, intelligence not essential.'" Ahahahaha! I was so amused. What a genuine piece of boys being boys. ♥

My morning has been fine, including a quite nice lecture by a real smart woman. It would have been much better, however, if I hadn't forgotten my coffee on my desk at home, and therefore wasn't in an exhausted daze right now. It would have been much MUCH better if I hadn't ALSO forgotten my wallet, and therefore can't even buy myself a latte like I was planning. I can get free coffee when I get back to lab but I've got my priorities and I'm using my extra time from class ending early to chill in a common area and read my book.

My meeting with Jason was moved once again, to tomorrow, due to a sudden scheduling conflict. AHHHH! *headless chickens some more* One way or another this is gonna be resolved soon...

Current Mood: listless

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(no subject)

Everyone on Twitter has heard far too much about this today, so I thought I'd bring my whining to you lovely folks! This morning, I woke up with a yucky sore throat. Not a horrible one, but still obviously sick. I didn't feel very hungry either. I drank a cup of tea, and forced myself to eat a couple slices of toast.

Today, since then, I have drank 5 more cups of tea, ate two bowls of ramen (for lunch and dinner), ate an orange, and nothing else. My sore throat has progressed to the type where I have to brace myself every time I need to swallow because of the horror it will bring. I have gargled salt water, I have eaten spoonsful of lemon and honey. The tea helped for a while each time, but now it's stopped helping and I am simply pure misery. I am achey and tired and I *feel* flushed, but the thermometer assures me I don't have a fever. (Another weird thing: despite the massive amount of fluids I've consumed, I've only had to pee like twice - if I was healthy I'd have had to go at least 5 times by now. Just another demonstration that my body is Not Okay at the moment.) I've felt this lots of times before - the cold that feels just like how everyone describes the flu, but it isn't actually the flu. Hopefully my symptoms will be better and not worse tomorrow, because I have a busy day ahead of me.

UGH MISERY. *makes pathetic faces at you*

In other news, I have an appointment with Jason on Friday.

Commence quiet freakout.

Current Mood: nervous

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(no subject)

In NEWS OF AWESOMENESS, I have almost-concrete plans to go back to Dublin! YAAAAAY! With Cary and Emily, two of my American friends from my year in Dublin! YAAAAAAAAAAY!

*does the boogie dance of I'm-going-back-to-Dublin-YAY* You WISH you could see this dance!

For all newcomers to this here corner of the internet (I'm so sorry to the vets! At least I haven't rambled about Dublin in the recent past?), a brief recap: from 2007-08, I spent 9 months studying abroad at Trinity College Dublin, studying chemistry/biochemistry. I lived in a posh apartment in downtown Dublin, met dozens of wonderful Irish folks who became literally some of my best friends in the world, met 4 American girls who formed a very close pod of awesomeness and with whom I still keep in touch almost daily, had more life experiences than I have in my other 20 years of life combined, and kinda-sorta-maybe fell a little bit in love... with the city, with a boy, with the person I discovered inside myself when I was there. The before and after photos of my soul would be striking - Before Dublin (B.D.) I was withdrawn, shy, lonely, and wracked by self-consciousness and self-doubt, but After Dublin (A.D.) I was confident, assertive, bold, and happy. I emerged a different person, complete with a whole new passel of friends who accepted me completely for who I was. They still keep me going on a day-to-day basis.

I cannot say enough about the transformative and joyful nature of that experience. I have said loads in the past - if you are at all curious, my "dublin" tag has all the dirty details (including the sordid accounts of eleven ~encounters with Irish boys. Mm hmmmmm ;) My first kiss was from a red-headed Irish boy in a pub while drunk on Guinness during my first week in Dublin - top THAT) and my "dublin - missing" tag has all the nostalgia and reflection. I have often gone back and read those entries in order to recapture even just a fraction of the joy I felt while writing them.

SO ANYWAY, I went back to Dublin last May, and it was everything I remembered and more. I've resolved to make Dublin returns an annual thing whenever possible, a biannual (as in, every other year) thing when not. This year, I was going to try to go with the 4 American girls mentioned above. Unfortunately, a couple people have fallen through, but it looks like 3 of us are going to be able to go at the same time! We'll only overlap a couple days, but they'll be a GREAT couple of days (I haven't seen these girls since August 2008!!!) and then I will stay about a week longer to see my Irish loves (most of them are still there doing PhDs, Masters, or working). It is the MOST EXCITING EVER and I am practically vibrating out of my skin with anticipation.

THE CAVEAT: This plan hinges pretty sharply on whether or not Jason accepts me into his lab. If he does, I am 95% certain that he will totally okay this plan and everything will move ahead smoothly. If he does not, the problem is twofold: I will have to work hard to find another advisor I want to work with, and also I have absolutely no way of knowing if that person would be amenable to me taking a week off to fly to Europe during my rotation.

SO. In short. I am so fucking nervous about Jason's decision I could puke. The ramifications go FAR FAR beyond my trip to Dublin. If Jason accepts me, I will have a wonderful graduate experience and get to do science I am truly excited about. If he doesn't - I honestly don't have a clear alternative at the moment. FML.

I just emailed Jason about setting up a meeting. It's likely the meeting will occur within the next week or two.

Everyone cross all of your appendages, pray to whatever deities you believe in, and send good vibes my way, will you? ♥