I'm not going through the exact thing you are, but damn if our situations aren't the same!!
I moved away from my H.S. (and all my friends) in my Junior year, and went into Independent Studies to get my diploma, which kind of left me socially crippled because I enjoyed my alone time too much (enter TV obsession). So, without the whole graduation ceremony, where you really say goodbye, it took me awhile before I felt like "omfg, I may never see any of my friends again", and that's terrifying. Sadly, when you're in H.S. all you can see is H.S. and focus surviving the next day, then it's over and you're like "wait... what?" So I think it's similar for you and College.
But now, (you and I both) are heading off to a different country for school, and I'm going to be going through what you just did this summer: being on my own (in a dorm, obviously) and away from my family for the first time. But, we're going to make all new friends and have a great time, despite how scary it might seem, or how depressing it is now. Because once we're there, it'll be this new chapter, and we'll be ready for it to change :D If the future you (the one nearing the end of her year in Ireland) could tell the present you anything, it'd probably be not to worry, and how exciting and amazing your year is going to be, and all the shiny new people you'll meet :D But see, you don't know that yet. In so many situations I look back and go "that was a waste of negative emotion, if I only knew then..." because it gets so much better, we just can't see that 'till we're out of it. And I know you're excited, I'm not saying you're not, and I know this is more about what you're leaving rather than what you'll be gaining. But just know that, when one great thing leaves your life? Whether it be friends or whatever? The next one comes in, and it's even better than the last! And you never know when you'll meet your old friends again. After 30 years my mom ran into her best friend from High School at the store, and they've kept in touch ever since, even though they hadn't over those 30 years. She even got my mom a job, when she really needed it. That story makes me feel more hopeful about my friendships, knowing they'll come back into your life when you need them, and at just the right time :)
Anyway, I'm babbling. I love you lots and I know this is going to be amazing for you and I hope you feel better soon ♥ ♥
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Date: 2007-08-03 05:05 am (UTC)I moved away from my H.S. (and all my friends) in my Junior year, and went into Independent Studies to get my diploma, which kind of left me socially crippled because I enjoyed my alone time too much (enter TV obsession). So, without the whole graduation ceremony, where you really say goodbye, it took me awhile before I felt like "omfg, I may never see any of my friends again", and that's terrifying. Sadly, when you're in H.S. all you can see is H.S. and focus surviving the next day, then it's over and you're like "wait... what?" So I think it's similar for you and College.
But now, (you and I both) are heading off to a different country for school, and I'm going to be going through what you just did this summer: being on my own (in a dorm, obviously) and away from my family for the first time. But, we're going to make all new friends and have a great time, despite how scary it might seem, or how depressing it is now. Because once we're there, it'll be this new chapter, and we'll be ready for it to change :D If the future you (the one nearing the end of her year in Ireland) could tell the present you anything, it'd probably be not to worry, and how exciting and amazing your year is going to be, and all the shiny new people you'll meet :D But see, you don't know that yet. In so many situations I look back and go "that was a waste of negative emotion, if I only knew then..." because it gets so much better, we just can't see that 'till we're out of it. And I know you're excited, I'm not saying you're not, and I know this is more about what you're leaving rather than what you'll be gaining. But just know that, when one great thing leaves your life? Whether it be friends or whatever? The next one comes in, and it's even better than the last! And you never know when you'll meet your old friends again. After 30 years my mom ran into her best friend from High School at the store, and they've kept in touch ever since, even though they hadn't over those 30 years. She even got my mom a job, when she really needed it. That story makes me feel more hopeful about my friendships, knowing they'll come back into your life when you need them, and at just the right time :)
Anyway, I'm babbling. I love you lots and I know this is going to be amazing for you and I hope you feel better soon ♥ ♥